Unlike a birth parent, the co-parent has no natural legal rights with respect to the child. That means that schools, health care providers, insurance companies and other officials may not release information to or accept directions from the co-parent. In fact, privacy laws prohibit their doing so.
There are, however, some documents which can give legal rights to a co-parent. If the birth parent wishes to do so, she or he can give the co-parent a power of attorney. The power of attorney can grant to the co-parent most of the same rights held by a biological or adoptive parent. For example, the co-parent may be given the right to receive school records, enroll the child in programs, or provide custody and discipline in the absence of the birth parent.
A parent can also execute an "Authorization to Consent to Health Care for Minor" under N.C.G.S. § 32A-34, whereby she or he can give authority to the co-parent to make medical decisions for their child.
A parent who is facing a progressive or irreversible illness can also designate a stand-by guardian for her or his minor child. See N.C.G.S. § 35A-1370 et seq.
A couple deciding to have a child together should give serious consideration to entering into a written contract that specifies what is to happen if the couple separates. The contract should address such matters as custody, visitation and child support. In contracts made by cohabitating heterosexual couples, North Carolina courts have recognized and enforced agreements that do not depend upon a sexual relationship. Such contracts are presumed to be binding on the parties, but the welfare of the child is always paramount. If, for example, a court decided that it would not be in the best interests of the child to have co-parent visitation rights, such a provision would not be enforced. A couple desiring such a contract should consult an attorney experienced in these matters.